Vampire musicals have something of a curse on them: namely that they tend to do the sorts of things that vampires would do if they existed: bite and suck. While there is one shining example hovering above the rest, Alex Loveless’s new adaptation of Bram Stoker’s defining novel isn’t it. What Loveless, Loveless (Liz, extra lyrics), & Loveless (Chris, director) give us instead is a tick-box list of how not to handle vampires in yet another version of Dracula.
See, a good vampire story is sexy. The whole lure of the forbidden and abandonment of morality in the face of a challenge to Good Christian Living stems from Stoker and it’s not here: Leigh Jones has presence as the legendary Count, but sexy? Nope. The female cast are so buttoned up that the Transylvanian may as well go back to planet Transsexual if he wants a chance of getting any. As much as Ann Rice’s prose may leave something to be desired and Elton John’s score was lacking, the duo delivered sexiness in abundance in Lestat.
Alternatively, a good vampire story is scary. The old Bela Lugosi films have lost much of their scare factor after decades of video nasties, but seventy-five years ago they were terrifying. The only scary thing about this musical was coming back for the second act.
On the other hand, you can go for spectacle: while Frank Wildhorn’s Dracula (which shares numerous book quotes with this one) also received a critical drubbing for its bore-factor it featured a top notch cast and Des McAnuff’s flair for the visual.
The LovelessX3 show has...no sex, no scare, and no budget. It also has no point (the scenes with Renfield go nowhere and amount to nothing,) no memorable songs, no choreography, and no wit. To that extent it does have the last trait of the Vampire: sin. To bore the audience to sleep (or an interval departure) is the greatest sin a creator can commit, and the night I went there was programme checking, nodding off, and interval departures in abundance.
In short, the [title of show] team say it best: DIE VAMPIRE, DIE!
Where: White Bear Theatre
When: Until 23 Nov., Tu-Sa @ 19:30, Su @ 17:00
How Much: £12 unreserved
Concessions: £10
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RZ Unofficial “Worth Paying”: £0. Stay home and take a nap or rent any of Hollywood’s better efforts. Or you could listen to....
RZ Other Notes: The greatest vampire musical of all time? Tanz der Vampire. Not the version Michael Crawford stunk up on Broadway but the original Austro-German edition which is scary, witty, sexy, and stunning.
Showing posts with label White Bear. Show all posts
Showing posts with label White Bear. Show all posts
Friday, 31 October 2008
Saturday, 18 October 2008
Catching Up: Four More...
As the RZ finds his will to live (or at least his will to make an effort on projects that don’t pay) sapped by job hunting hell, his posts are likely to be sporadic and minimal unless he finds something reaaaaaaalllllllly interesting to post about - like some recent things in the Graduion blog. But that’s another post.
After all, you’re here for reviews. And the RZ has been very, very lazy lately with posting those. So, without further ado, here’s four quick bites before running off to see Shit Mix tonight...
A Patriot For Me @ New Players - Solid production of a rarely-performed John “Look Back in Anger” Osborne play. Big cast, interesting historical subject (gay officer in the late-Habsburg Austrian army succumbing to blackmail), but the second act drags (literally and figuratively) and everybody is so damn smug that it detracts from the tension. That said, it’s never boring even it does meander. See it if you’ve got a free night.
A Skull in Connemara @ White Bear - Either you love Martin McDonagh or you loathe him, as his plays (excepting The Pillowman) tend to follow a similar formula. The RZ loves McDonagh’s works, and the sharp, witty writing in Skull makes for a short, biting play that’s paired with creative design in the White Bear’s space.
Hans Teeuwen (Comedian) - The RZ saw Mr. Teeuwen at BAC doing a gig in anticipation of his upcoming run at the Leicester Square, and found his act hit or miss. It’s much closer to German Kabarett than what most people would expect from Anglo-American stand-up. The press have made favourable comparisons to Eddie Izzard (who the RZ is not fond of as a stand-up) though a cross between Izzard and Bill Bailey would be more accurate since Teeuwen sings as well. Teeuwen’s act jumps from biting material on FGM freedom of speech to absurdist skits (some of which go on far too long) and songs with the mandatory use of dick jokes to break up the bits. Good at BAC prices, not so much for the West End.
Betwixt! in Concert - It’s hard to say a lot about this as 1)it’s a charity gig and therefore hard to rag on regardless and 2)other than some song rehearsals the whole thing only had 24 hours to rehearse as a whole. The show is still great, there have been a few revisions (including one song getting slightly repositioned), and word on the street is that Off-Broadway is the next stop for this charming piece.
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And now we’re all caught up. Just in time for four shows in the next week...
After all, you’re here for reviews. And the RZ has been very, very lazy lately with posting those. So, without further ado, here’s four quick bites before running off to see Shit Mix tonight...
A Patriot For Me @ New Players - Solid production of a rarely-performed John “Look Back in Anger” Osborne play. Big cast, interesting historical subject (gay officer in the late-Habsburg Austrian army succumbing to blackmail), but the second act drags (literally and figuratively) and everybody is so damn smug that it detracts from the tension. That said, it’s never boring even it does meander. See it if you’ve got a free night.
A Skull in Connemara @ White Bear - Either you love Martin McDonagh or you loathe him, as his plays (excepting The Pillowman) tend to follow a similar formula. The RZ loves McDonagh’s works, and the sharp, witty writing in Skull makes for a short, biting play that’s paired with creative design in the White Bear’s space.
Hans Teeuwen (Comedian) - The RZ saw Mr. Teeuwen at BAC doing a gig in anticipation of his upcoming run at the Leicester Square, and found his act hit or miss. It’s much closer to German Kabarett than what most people would expect from Anglo-American stand-up. The press have made favourable comparisons to Eddie Izzard (who the RZ is not fond of as a stand-up) though a cross between Izzard and Bill Bailey would be more accurate since Teeuwen sings as well. Teeuwen’s act jumps from biting material on FGM freedom of speech to absurdist skits (some of which go on far too long) and songs with the mandatory use of dick jokes to break up the bits. Good at BAC prices, not so much for the West End.
Betwixt! in Concert - It’s hard to say a lot about this as 1)it’s a charity gig and therefore hard to rag on regardless and 2)other than some song rehearsals the whole thing only had 24 hours to rehearse as a whole. The show is still great, there have been a few revisions (including one song getting slightly repositioned), and word on the street is that Off-Broadway is the next stop for this charming piece.
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And now we’re all caught up. Just in time for four shows in the next week...
Monday, 1 September 2008
THOUGHTS: Under the Eagle
Sometimes, being an American abroad can be an unpleasant experience. Sitting through a 2.5 hour play about how the US government is an evil force out solely to protect its own interest generally tends to be one of them.
Such is the thrust of Andrew Cartmel’s (Dr Who, Torchwood) new play Under the Eagle. It opens as Vi, a vicious political comedienne (Francesca Anderson), is arrested onstage in the middle of a piece about the Prime Minister being a gutless whore subservient to the Americans, only to have been invited to a weekend retreat by the PM’s American wife Tamina (Claire Louise Amias). Matters quickly escalate when it’s revealed that Tamina’s not just looking for a celeb to pal around with, but wants Vi present as a reminder to her husband that the British public are sick of cowtowing to American demands. See, it turns out that the American president, Lenore Rose Locke (Angela Dixon failing at accents) is in Britain to supervise the handover of a suspected terrorist: a suspected terrorist who’s a British citizen and possibly not guilty of any actual terrorism. It’s up to the Prime Minister (David Morley Hale) to stand for what’s right as sex and politics fly while Vi gets it on with the deputy PM, much to the frustrations of LRL’s manipulatively motivated Chief of Staff (Eben Young, an actual American).
Fortunately, Cartmel has actually stood and delivered a tight piece of political theatre despite some padded dialogue. Both sides are equally sleazy, from the British use of passive-aggressive interference to LRL’s part-George W Bush part-Hillary Clinton mixture of evangelical ruthlessness. And while the surprise twist in the second act is worthy, the ending is unsurprising and confirms what everybody knows all along: in the end you make compromises and sacrifices no matter how unpopular they may be.
Where: White Bear Theatre
When: Closed
How Much: £12 General Admission
Concessions: £10
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RZ Unofficial “Worth Paying”: £12. Well written and entertaining without sacrificing intellect. It’s uncomfortable at times but not to the point of being painful.
RZ Other Notes: Seating at the White Bear is L-Shaped. Arrive early to get onto one of the two long benches. The funniest line in the play involves LRL walking in on the Prime Minister who is in the process of being seduced by Tamina. After a fight ensues LRL asks the PM to pray with her. He stutters out a refusal to which LRL replies “You don’t want to pray with me?” “No. I want to have wild, deviant sex with my wife!” Hence the reason there will always be a Britain.
Such is the thrust of Andrew Cartmel’s (Dr Who, Torchwood) new play Under the Eagle. It opens as Vi, a vicious political comedienne (Francesca Anderson), is arrested onstage in the middle of a piece about the Prime Minister being a gutless whore subservient to the Americans, only to have been invited to a weekend retreat by the PM’s American wife Tamina (Claire Louise Amias). Matters quickly escalate when it’s revealed that Tamina’s not just looking for a celeb to pal around with, but wants Vi present as a reminder to her husband that the British public are sick of cowtowing to American demands. See, it turns out that the American president, Lenore Rose Locke (Angela Dixon failing at accents) is in Britain to supervise the handover of a suspected terrorist: a suspected terrorist who’s a British citizen and possibly not guilty of any actual terrorism. It’s up to the Prime Minister (David Morley Hale) to stand for what’s right as sex and politics fly while Vi gets it on with the deputy PM, much to the frustrations of LRL’s manipulatively motivated Chief of Staff (Eben Young, an actual American).
Fortunately, Cartmel has actually stood and delivered a tight piece of political theatre despite some padded dialogue. Both sides are equally sleazy, from the British use of passive-aggressive interference to LRL’s part-George W Bush part-Hillary Clinton mixture of evangelical ruthlessness. And while the surprise twist in the second act is worthy, the ending is unsurprising and confirms what everybody knows all along: in the end you make compromises and sacrifices no matter how unpopular they may be.
Where: White Bear Theatre
When: Closed
How Much: £12 General Admission
Concessions: £10
------------------------
RZ Unofficial “Worth Paying”: £12. Well written and entertaining without sacrificing intellect. It’s uncomfortable at times but not to the point of being painful.
RZ Other Notes: Seating at the White Bear is L-Shaped. Arrive early to get onto one of the two long benches. The funniest line in the play involves LRL walking in on the Prime Minister who is in the process of being seduced by Tamina. After a fight ensues LRL asks the PM to pray with her. He stutters out a refusal to which LRL replies “You don’t want to pray with me?” “No. I want to have wild, deviant sex with my wife!” Hence the reason there will always be a Britain.
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